House of Wolves

[if currentTime === INITIAL] You wake to daylight, softly filtering through your window. Your bed is comfy and warm and you don't want to get up, but you know you have to. So you do. You should probably go [[wash up]] first, then you've got some [[work]] to do. After that, [[dinner]]. [if currentTime === WASHED_UP] Morning light still shines in through your window. There's plenty of time left till [[dinner]]. You should use that time to get today's [[work]] done. [if currentTime === DONE_WORK] Time passes. You've worked yourself hard today. The light in your window has all but disappeared. It's [[dinnertime->dinner]]. [if currentTime === EATEN] It's dark out. You've had a hard day. Get yourself some [[rest->bed]].

currentTime (currentTime === INITIAL): WASHED_UP -- You wash yourself quickly but carefully. You know what "presentable" looks like, and you need to look presentable at dinner. When you're done drying off, you head back to your [[room->Room]].

_timeOK: currentTime === WASHED_UP currentTime (_timeOK): DONE_WORK -- [if _timeOK] You sit down at your computer and check your to-do list: [if _timeOK && currentDay === 1] 1. [[attend lecture]] 1. finish stack from 240 project 1. notes ch 2 [if _timeOK && currentDay === 2] 1. <del>attend lecture</del> 1. [[finish stack from 240 project]] 1. notes ch 2 [if _timeOK && currentDay === 3] 1. <del>attend lecture</del> 1. <del>finish stack from 240 project</del> 1. [[notes ch 2]] [if _timeOK] Take your time. The only thing left after your work is dinner. [if taskDone] That's enough for today. You should try to [[relax->Room]] till dinner. [if !_timeOK && !taskDone] No, no. If you start working *now*, you'll inevitably forget to wash up before dinner and you won't look convincing. That won't do. [[Wash up->wash up]] first and then come back.

_oldTime: currentTime _timeOK: currentTime === DONE_WORK currentTime (_timeOK): EATEN -- [if _timeOK] You reach the dining table and are presented with a thick slab of fresh [[meat]]. They're waiting for you to begin. You could hardly [[refuse->excused]]. [if !_timeOK] You don't want to rush to dinner. Take your time. [if _oldTime === INITIAL; append] If you want to step out of your room, you might as well [[wash up]]. [if _oldTime === WASHED_UP; append] You've still got [[work]] to do, after all.

[align center] *Someday, we won't have to wear that mask. We'll be free. \ Until then, all we can do is live->Ending-2.*

taskDone: true -- Your life has looked almost exactly the same for every day of the past however-many months. You wake up, do the bare minimum to keep yourself presentable, and then usually sit at your computer half-watching a man hundreds of miles away from you draw on his computer. Presumably these drawings are important. Sometimes, you even write down the words he says; this is generally considered to be a good use of your time. You've found it hard to believe you're a *person*, lately. You have a vague idea that *people* are supposed to go outside, see their friends, take walks in parks, et cetera. Instead you just sit at home, and [[go through the motions->work]] of study. Stagnating. You're still water, and the bugs have started to lay their eggs in you.

taskDone: true -- Two of the core principles of object-oriented programming are *encapsulation* and *abstraction*. To *encapsulate* is to [[hide->work]] your insides from prying eyes. Never let them see what makes you tick; never show them more than the mask you wear. *Abstraction* is a more powerful way to hide. It allows you to inhabit the mask so totally, so cleanly, that you let the world ignore everything *but* the mask. In every way that matters, you *become* the mask. These are principles you must master.

taskDone: true -- One exam season before you graduated, you and your friends studied together. You'd sit at the same table just outside your sophomore year history classroom and do flash cards, or search through textbook chapters for answers to study guide questions. You think that's how it's *supposed* to be, instead of just you in your room. Alone with the specter of who they want you to be. You've almost forgotten what it's like *not* to have that pressure bearing down on you. Separated from your friends, separated from any form of escape, you've buckled under its weight. Let them stamp you down into the cracks till there's nothing left to break. You pretend it makes it easier. That it makes it hurt any less. I need you to [[keep going->work]] anyways.

[if currentDay === 1] You obediently lower your head and sink your teeth into the meat. It tastes like iron and rot. You manage to tear a chunk free, and then you mash it up in your mouth until you can't escape the taste of it. You choke it down. Tears stream down your face. Once you can breathe again, you say that you're not hungry tonight, and beg to be [[excused]]. [if currentDay === 2] You try. You try so hard. Yet you only make it a couple of bites before it's all trying to come back up your throat. That sick feeling won't leave the pit of your stomach. You're sweating. You plead that you can't take it, and ask to be allowed to [[leave->excused]]. [if currentDay === 3] You block out the horrible taste. You block out the smell. You block out the feeling of it going down your throat, the sickness you feel, everything. You eat and eat and struggle to keep it all down. You take breaks. Then you continue this sick, painful endeavor. Eventually, you finish what's been put before you. You're {reveal link: 'done', passage: 'done'}.

swallows: 0 -- [if currentDay === 1] Did you really think it was going to be that easy? You're a wolf. No matter what, you will always be a wolf. And wolves eat meat. So you're going to eat meat, and you're going to [[like it]]. Now finish that. [if currentDay === 2] Why can't you ever *listen*? Why can't you ever be *normal*? Don't you understand that this is all for your own good? Are you being spiteful or are you just stupid? It doesn't matter. You are not expected to question this. You are expected to *[[obey->like it]]*. [if currentDay === 3] [align center] **[[YOU DON'T FUCKING GET TO SAY NO]].**

[if currentDay === 1] When you're done your eyes burn from crying. You can feel your gag reflex trying to kick in and all you can do is hope you won't undo all your hard work by throwing up. You can barely get yourself standing, but you *need* to wash the taste out of your mouth. You've been told repeatedly that this kind of behavior is not what is expected from you. No one else will accept you if you act this way. So [[do better->Room]]. [if currentDay === 2] You're done. It's okay. Wipe your eyes and take deep breaths; they don't like it when you cry. Yes, like that. It's okay. You're okay. You're done. You can head back to your [[room->Room]] whenever you're ready.

_oldDay: currentDay currentDay: currentDay + 1 currentTime: INITIAL taskDone: false -- [if _oldDay === 1] In the dream you stand on a barren rock and look up into the endless night, searching its shimmering sea of stars. You know in your heart that hidden within that sea, a few tiny specks raise their voices in beautiful harmony. You know their song. You [[want->Room]] so badly to join it. You know as your voice sails out into the stars that nobody will ever hear you. Still, you [if _oldDay === 2] When you wake you won't remember if it was a dream or a memory but you sit with people whose faces you can't remember and they offer you a new kind of meat that's had something done to it, and you were afraid of it at first because it looks different and feels different and smells *amazing* and surely it was too good to be true that when you bit down it came apart effortlessly and when you chew the juice that comes out is flavored like nothing you've ever tasted and you think everyone else when they eat always seems to feel the way you think you do in that moment and you think you want---no you *[[need->Room]]* more you need this to be what it's always like and you know that it's not going to happen anytime soon but [if _oldDay === 3] You dream that you walk an endless path through a cold land. Wind stings your eyes and numbs your fingers. It *hurts*. Yet you keep walking. Somewhere further down the path is a bonfire. You will sit there, unmasked, warm, and surrounded by friends. You'll eat good food and sip a warm drink. You'll laugh at stupid jokes. You'll toast marshmallows. When you set out on your path again, you will be warmer. Not because the path is any less cold, but because an ember, fed by love and hope, burns hot inside your heart. When you are plunged into the darkest of nights, when you are attacked by the coldest and most vicious winds, you will not freeze, you will not sink into despair. You will *[[live->Ending-2]]*.

INITIAL: 0 WASHED_UP: 1 DONE_WORK: 2 EATEN: 3 currentTime: INITIAL currentDay: 1 taskDone: false config.style.page.font: "Georgia/serif 19" config.style.page.color: "#ced4da on black" config.style.page.link.font: "underline" config.style.page.link.color: "#fa5252" config.style.page.link.lineColor: "#fa5252" config.style.page.link.active.color: "black on #fa5252" config.style.page.header.font: "16" config.style.page.header.link.font: "small caps" config.style.page.footer.font: "18" config.style.page.footer.color: "#ced4da" config.style.page.footer.link.font: "small caps" -- [CSS] h1 { font-size: 40px; } [align center] # House of Wolves ## [[BEGIN->Room]] **[[Credits]]** **[[Content Warnings->CWs]]**

[align center] # House of Wolves *by [Shruti Deo](https://justonesage.itch.io/)*

[align center] **House of Wolves** depicts the POV character experiencing **abusive parenting** in a way that can be extremely upsetting. It contains intentionally uncomfortable scenes where the point-of-view character is **forced** (pressured as well as literally, physically forced) **to eat** something harmful and unpleasant to them. **Vomiting** is mentioned in response to this. Intentionally off-putting **descriptions of meat** are prominent within the story. It contains scenes that may be upsettingly similar to depictions of **transphobia** or other forms of anti-queer **bigotry**. There is non-graphic, metaphorical mention of **bugs laying eggs** inside the point-of-view character. {back link, label: 'BACK'}

[align center] Writing and programming by **[Shruti Deo](https://justonesage.itch.io/)** Cover art by **[MangoAzalea](https://www.tumblr.com/mangoazalea-art)** Playtested by **Tilly**, **Ella**, and **Kei** [Twine platform](https://twinery.org/) and Chapbook story format by **Chris Klimas** {back link, label: 'BACK'}

If you're reading this (first of all, why? go play my game. second of all, lmao), hi! I also like opening up the inspector on twine games, it's fun and silly. I left this in here because the game is very much still in development as I'm writing this and I'm probably going to forget to take this passage out once I'm done, so I figured I'd break the fourth wall a bit. hope this has been fun! TODOs for a post-comp release: 1. fuck with metagamers some more 2. add cover image to game 2. consider adding slight differences to language between days in other contexts 3. make washing up different (explicitly mention looking like a real wolf after the first day) 4. make relaxing in your room actually do something 5. win IFComp (maybe. hopefully.)

_MAX: 7 swallows: swallows + 1 -- [if swallows <= 1] Bite. Chew. {reveal link: 'Swallow', passage: 'like it'}. [if 1 < swallows && swallows < _MAX] Swallow. Bite. Chew. {reveal link: 'Swallow', passage: 'like it'} [if swallows >= _MAX] Swallow. Bite. Chew. [[Swallow]]

Please understand that, as they force your mouth open, they're doing it for you. When that bitter, metallic taste overwhelms you, when the slimy feeling as it goes down your throat makes you retch, know that it's your fault that they need to do this. As you stumble, sobbing, back to your room, take comfort in the fact that this was all for your own good. Know that they love you. *[[Say it back->Room]].*

not done at all. Did you really think that was enough? It's shameful enough they have to push you to eat like a real wolf, and you can't even make it to the bare minimum. They deposit another slab of meat in front of you. No. You can't do this. You can't do this. [[Please->excused]]